Tumbleweed Hex Announced to the Crazy via Hallucinatory Nonsense

Nowhere, Tx. I has lately come to the attention of this writer who shall remain anonymous that various persons have received warnings via "visions" that a tumbleweed hex is in the forecast for Nowhere this week. Since nobody in Nowhere believes in "visions" at all, the folks having said "psychic revelations" are now considered quite a bit crazy and their "visions" have been dubbed hallucinations by such important big wigs as Mayor Jim-Paul of Nowhere, who is an expert on normalcy in this region. The wackos mentioned have, nevertheless, insisted that their supposed predictions be noted in the paper of record, which also bears a moniker coincidentally related to such non-existent phenom as is referenced in the supposed predictions. The West Texas Tumbleweed has agreed to announce this nonsense in order to placate these sudden "psychics", but nobody should bother thinking much about their little predictions because they are not considered sane. The visions reported involved the entire town being hemmed in by a veritable wall of tumbleweeds such as to be impassible, which is utterly impossible. There was some cackling involved in the imaginal events, so they jumped to the absurd conclusion that it was to be another hexing event. We're sure there is nothing to worry your pretty heads about, though. Tumbleweeds in these parts prefer to run fast.