Local Wacko Falls In Abandoned Pool and Becomes Discombobulated

Some local idiot named Dirk, whose middle name nobody can find, couldn't leave well enough alone. Sadly, this is a pun, as the oft offending prankster found his way to The Black Mansion, former abode of The Wicked Witch of West Texas and decided to hit the well and see if he might fill the pool and take a dip. How he got through the razor wire and the terror instilled by long association with said witch is anyone's guess, but he was enough of an asshole that nobody is too much troubled by the fact that he's now an order-taking automaton. It's actually seen as a great improvement in his personality and temperament, and has been greeted with enthusiasm by his associates. The incident is not without complication, however. A controversy has erupted with some positing that Dirk is actually a test subject in some weird magical technology testing still being carried out by The Wicked Witch, from one of several remote locations. This fills some with dread, but it fills others with hope because the simple truth is that Dirk was a local problem which is seemingly solved and even the conspiracy fearers are loathe to find fault with that outcome. Dirk is also deep purple over about half of his body. It's spotty and actually rather amusing to look at, so it's seen as an aesthetic improvement to the general Nowhere fauna. Some have taken to calling him El Pinto and pinning a pony tail to his behind as he carries out orders throughout the day. Some folks feel bad about laughing so hard they spit their drinks. The feelings probably stem from the ensuing mess. So far the outcome of this incident is regarded as a net positive, with a few nervous Nelly types fretting about how it changes the sort of terrors that terrorize them, or at least adds to the list. Some have rightly pointed out that Dirk is merely suffering the consequences of his destructive behavior, only one part of a larger spree of vandalism that touched many in the community, which is why so few are up in arms or out of sorts or have their panties twisted over it. Developing.